Saturday, July 22, 2023

This Thing Men Call Death

At 5:30 last night, I sent a text to Corey "How are things?" And I'll let Corey's reply document most of what the past 24 hours have been like for him:

"Horrible. my mom is at home now. The hospice nurse just came. My mom is crying out in pain, but the pharmacy has not delivered the medication yet - we hope it will get here in about an hour? She is really dehydrated. The hospice nurse just left to visit a family where the patient just died but will come back as soon as she can. They do not give IVs for hydration in hospice. The hospice nurse says usually its about 72 hours from this point. The hospice nurse says once the pain meds get here she will be out until she passes. Joanne S is here and there have been other visitors. The nurse explained to me the process of going through her last breaths and when it comes. I went to the hospital this morning first thing - just to see if she was still alive. all that said, considering her situation I'm glad that she's here at home. I'm so grateful for what she has done for me and given me. it's draining to go sit next to someone and try to absorb some of their suffering - which doesn't appear to do anything for them, but drains the life from me. Around 7pm Jeremy's friend up the street had prescription drugs (not for mom) that the nurse gave her....so she has been sleeping peacefully since."

Corey listened to this talk yesterday, and was listening to it again this morning on his way to the temple and he was feeling very happy for his mom - Brent L. Top - What is This Thing Men Call Death" In that talk, Bro Top doesn't talk about hell at all, but assuming you are righteous, the spirit world is going to be pretty great. I have no doubt it will be great for JeNeal. On Corey's way to the temple, his sister called to say that JeNeal had passed away, they think around 6 am. If Corey had been at the temple when she died, that could have been cool - I wonder if she would have snuck in to say hi! But Corey  didn't go to the temple, and instead turned around and went to be with his dad. We left Bear Lake around 9:30, and came straight to be with Corey and his family. The mortuary was waiting to take JeNeal away until we were able to come say goodbye. Nancy captured this sweet photo of Daniel holding her hand.
The reunion was fun, aside from Corey not being there because of everything going on with his mom. He had the van, so we had to figure out how to get all of our stuff and all of our kids home. My parents and Neil brought most of our kids and stuff. They went to Neil's house, unloaded Neil's stuff from Mom's van, then they were able to fit our stuff in their van and get the kids in too. It was a bit of juggling. Plus a flat tire on the way! Wes helped fix that - 
I arrived first with Mel, Abi, Sophi, Owen, Daniel, Peter and Katharine. Wes, Lily, and Natalie arrived via my parents & Grant an hour later after picking up the bench for the rental van and a reshuffling of luggage and people in Layton at Neil's house. Dad, Steph, and Grant giving Corey some love and support.
Inside, Corey talking with the little kids as they have their first experience with death. 
I had been there for a bit with the little kids by the time my parents came with the WLN, so I decided to head home and unpack. I took Mel, Abi, Natalie, Owen, Daniel, Peter and Katharine with me and my parents followed me and helped unload our stuff. We walked inside and I looked at the table at some pretty bare milkweed... "Oh yeah! I have caterpillars!" They were big enough for the kids to hold - 
They watched the caterpillars while I cleaned up the frass and got some new plants. They still had enough leaves to eat, but I got them some fresh plants and they were happy. 

My lil' sis Patrice had some time before she flew out, so I invited her to come over and we had reunion leftovers for dinner and then went to the Temple Quarry to explore. Little kids played in the river (Natalie lost one of her sandals!) 
And they climbed on boulders... and we old ladies did too!
It's been a little weird, maybe, to be having fun with family and a reunion while also experiencing death and sadness with JeNeal passing, but then again, I guess that's just life, right? Hard and good and sad and fun all mixed together.

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