100 Day Streak!

Today is a special day for Sophi and Natalie, because it marks their 100th straight day of violin practicing! Around that time, in the Utah Suzuki Federation magazine, I read about a girl who had practiced for 600+ straight days and then missed some during a family vacation, and I was inspired. I thought "We can do this!" and so they had their lesson on January 24th and that was the first day and they have practiced every day since. On Sundays we usually sight read a few simplified hymns, and I count their Monday lessons as their practicing on those days. I was worried we'd lose the streak during our Florida trip last month, but we brought one violin and they shared it and they practiced everyday during that trip (2nd to last pic). Sure, those Florida days weren't a lot of practicing work, it was usually just doing slow practice of the new song they were working on two times, but they still did it every day! Natalie even did it our last day there at 10pm after a full day at Universal (last pic) Sophi had practiced that morning. They probably wouldn't have gotten this far without my help and reminders and insistence, but they've done most of it. I'm really proud of them! And so today, to celebrate 100 days, they got a reward. I was thinking taking them out for Costa Vida, but they wanted Chuck A Rama... We'd probably have to wait until Saturday if you want to do that. "What about Classic Skating?" Mmm, that would be even longer and we'd probably have to wait until the 14th if you want to do that. They wanted to do something today, and couldn't decide, so then I just said "Get in the car, let's go" and we did my plan. I thought they could each chose our a new dress, so we went to Kid to Kid, and Sophi decided on shoes, but then they both couldn't decide, so we decided to look somewhere else, after I bought three muslin blankets for the new baby. Then we went to Walmart. They decided for food they'd take candy. I let them each pick out 3 theater boxes of treats. 

So we did candy instead of a restaurant or eating out. And then they decided against clothes and chose a lego set instead. Sophi's was less expensive so she also got a pair of shoes. 

So good job girls. My duty is done for now, we'll have another small shopping spree in another 100 days! I have not kept a 100 day streak myself. I keep starting over and am currently on streak day 3. My left hand starts to go numb after about 10 minutes of practicing, I'm guessing from all the extra blood in my body that cuts off my nerves, which usually happens with pregnancy. 

Another thing we're going to try doing soon is a chore chart. I have not been doing a good job and getting the kids to help with chores, and I recently got a Love and Logic email that a friend forwarded to me. It put chores as a #10 level of importance, right up there with parent/child relationships! I read it to Mel and we were both inspired. She spent a lot of time today working on a chore chart poster for a race for the kids. We did that once when she was little and she remembered doing it and liked it, so she made one like that. We did it in 2014 and I remember we also did it when we were living in student housing at BYU. I'm guessing that first time is the one that she remembers, when she was young and impressionable.

Here's the email my friend sent - really good stuff! 

Does almost every day feel like a blur? Do you often find yourself wishing you had five or six more hands so you could juggle everything that comes your way? Conscientious parents in today’s world face a dizzying array of competing demands upon their time and energy. When everything heading our way feels like an ultimate essential, it can be tough to determine where to place our priorities.

 

On a scale of 1 to 10, how would we at Love and Logic rank the importance of homework, grades, sports, chores, and parent-child relationships? As you read, keep in mind that these rankings are based on empirical research as well as decades of experience with thousands of parents, educators, and other professionals… and of course my own subconscious biases. Ultimately, all of us have to decide what’s best for our unique children, families, and schools.

 

Homework

 

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Homework is important, but nearly 100 years of research has failed to give it a stellar grade. Much of the debate reflects researchers’ difficulty determining how much homework is done by kids… and how much is primarily done by their parents.

 

Provide a time and place for your children to complete their homework. Help them as long as it is fun for both of you… and as long as they are doing most of the work. Because homework only receives a three on the scale, let them be responsible for either getting it done or explaining to their teacher why they haven’t. Never fight with your kids over homework.

 

  See: Trautwein, U., & Koller, O. (2003). The relationship between homework and achievement—still much of a mystery. Educational Psychology Review, 15, 115-145. 

Grades

 

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Grades are important but not as important as developing character and a passion for learning. Besides, too many kids begin to gravitate toward easier subjects and classes because they are more concerned with GPA rather than true intellectual growth.

 

Sports (and other healthy extracurricular activities)

 

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Kids who participate in sports, music lessons, and other healthy extracurricular activities are far less likely to become involved in drugs, sex, and other damaging behaviors. They also tend to do better in school!

 

  See: Stephens, L. J., & Schaben, L. A. (2002, March). The effect of interscholastic sports participation on academic achievement of middle level school activities. National Association of Secondary School Principals Bulletin, 86, 34-42. 

Chores

 

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Yes! Chores are more important than homework, grades, and extracurricular activities. Chores… completed without chronic reminders and without pay… help our kids feel more tightly connected to the family team. Chores also help them to develop perseverance, combat entitlement, and build healthy self-esteem. In a Love and Logic home, kids get to do their homework and participate in extracurricular activities after they have finished contributing to the family.

 

Parent-Child Relationships

 

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Love and Logic is all about developing healthy relationships… relationships that last a lifetime. Why? Because there’s nothing more important to life-long success than our children viewing us as being simultaneously loving and strong. Too frequently this relationship is sacrificed in an attempt to nag, threaten, or punish kids into doing their homework and getting good grades.

 

Conclusion: There are many paths to success. Some kids go the traditional route, finding relatively easy success in learning and in school. Others struggle with school yet develop valuable skills through other avenues. When all is said and done, the priorities should always be placed on improving relationships, building good character, and helping kids learn to focus on their strengths.

So I thought that was really good and want to do better. The topic of delegating came up last week in our study group (2nd paragraph) when Moses was taking on too much and Jethro encouraged him to delegate, and one impression I got as I studied that was that I need to get the kids to help around the house more. They do pretty good at practicing music and doing their homework, so we're keeping those things on the chart for some easy star stickers to earn. Cleaning their rooms and doing a household chore are the two things we're going to work on these next few weeks. Those are the 4 things they need to do to get 4 stars each day - Bedroom/Clothes, Homework, Music, Household Chore. And if they are finished with everything before dinner they can get an extra star. Also they can get extra stars by doing extra chores. We'll probably officially start the chore chart race on Monday, after we introduce it on Sunday, I'll use it as a Mother's Day Gift to myself, hehe.