When They Remember Their Mother

I've recommitted myself to writing to Joseph. We've kinda slacked off with writing him now that we talk to him via video every week. But he asked for letters, so I wrote a good one last week, and did another good one today. Go me. Of course we'll still "parent" Joseph for the rest of his and our lives, but our parenting job of guiding and preparing him is done. He's out on his own and he seems to be a fuctioning adult, so maybe we did a good job. Here's my letter to him today:

Hi Joseph! 

It's been a good weekend. I've studied the Book of Mormon a lot this week - I started over with 1 Nephi at the beginning of the month but got on a nice tangent after reading 1 Nephi 17:3 with the "And thus we see" phrase. I looked up each time that phrase is used and what we are being taught - cause that phrase to me means they are emphasizing and pointing out "This is the point I'm trying to teach you..." and it's usually Mormon pointing out something to us in the latter days, and once when they are teaching the Nephites - Alma teaching Zeezrom (Alma 12:22). Here is a picture of the list I made. I used my smart phone to search for the phrase, so I think that is all of them. 

I made a chain in my scriptures, numbering each verse and then listing each reference before and after. I also loved Helaman 12 - like I could have highlighted that whole chapter as a point of the story - I nicknamed it Mormon's Rant, cause he kinda just goes off!

What else... we cleaned the chapel on Saturday morning. Natalie worked a little bit but then she wanted to teach us a lesson so she wrote on the white board and said "CLEAN THE CHURCH" (CLI THE CRSHR) while we worked. She is so cute, I'm going to miss her being gone all day next week when first grade starts.

For date night Dad came with me to see a 3d Movie about monarchs at Thanksgiving Point. We haven't had any butterflies yet this year, but I finally did find two eggs on Sunday morning. They haven't hatched yet, I hope they're not duds... Monarchs don't flutter when they migrate, they glide! they can be a mile up in the air floating basically in the air currents, pretty amazing. And at church we talked about Pres Nelson's talk about repentance - from the greek work metanoao - and I thought of metamorphosis - and she shared Elder Christofferson's daily bread talk, and I thought of how a caterpillar just feasts and feasts and eats and grows (like we feast on the word and that helps us grow) until we have a mighty change, like butterflies into chrysalis, and after that we learn to let the wind/Lord take us where he wants us to go. 

Monarchs are so amazing. I learned stuff I didn't know, Pretty amazing creatures. Peter slept through it. 

Dad and MHALSNO are on their way back from Bear Lake. I went up there yesterday with EDP, W was at Telluride. It was fun though!! I think we should do it again next year.

The beach  was basically as close to the tents as the beach was to the Stouts house in Costa Rica. Beautiful blue lake, it was shallow so there wasn't a fear of kids drowning...

Plenty of shade for the adults to sit and watch but not get cooked (Dad still got pretty red, I need to help him remember to always put on sunblock, his poor balding head just get burnt everytime, even in the shade.

It was what Park city should be but can't be because of the tv and too many different places to split off. We were all together, Mark cooked the meals for them, everyone was there, Dad, Gma and Gpa Wride, and SNO stayed in the worldmark room, the rest of the kids camped on the shore. 

Ethan and I drove back to pick up Wes and for the Crescent End of Year party at 7. When we left Logan the car light said low pressure, and when we pulled in the drive way it was all the way flat!!!

I don't know if it was like that the whole time or just got flat near the end, but I feel very blessed and protected that we didn't get stuck on the side of the road with a flat or with a blow out. Maybe we ruined the car rim, I don't know, but yeah, I felt so thankful that we arrived home safely.

I went to the orthodontist today, I have 8 more weeks then I'm done! Yay. While i waited I read a LDS LIving magazine story of a couple who escaped North Korea. He left first,  he found the Catholic church, prayed for his wife to be able to come, he helped her escape. He wanted her to come to mass with her, but she didnt' like it. But he'd beg her to come and make deals like that he would clean the house if she came or other things. Then she let in LDS missionaries and really liked what they taught about eternal life, cause she knew she wanted to be iwth her family back in North Korea but that she would also never see them again on earth. So she loved it and loved going to the LDS church, but he felt loyal to his new catholic faith and friends, so then she made a deal with him: Come to church wtih me, and if you don't feel anything, I wont' ever bring it up again and we'll be catholic. He went and felt it as soon as he walked in the chapel. He said he saw the word "GOD" written above everyone's heads. So yeah, Jesus won that one!! They came to Utah as refugees and are living in Provo and going to Utah Valley and were sealed in the Provo City Center temple. I just love the church. I love the scriptures. We are so so blessed to have them, how did we get so lucky? What can we do to ever thank him enough? I hope one of you kids goes on a mission to Korea. I feel like Alma, but I also know what God has called me to do. My mission is motherhood!! And I love it and feel blessed to lose my life in serving you kids and your dad. I like this quote I heard from Elder Maxwell (as we drove to Bear Lake yesterday - October 2000 "The Tugs and Pulls of the World") "Let us likewise honor the special place of the family. As James Q. Wilson wrote: “We learn to cope with the people of this world because we learn to cope with the members of our family. Those who flee the family flee the world; bereft of the [family’s] affection, tutelage, and challenges, they are unprepared for the [world’s] tests, judgments, and demands” (The Moral Sense [1993], 163). How ironical that some go “into a far country” (Luke 15:13), leaving the nourishing family garden—in which there may be some weeds—and go into a desert with its tumbling sagebrush." I feel so lucky to be able to help all of you guys prepare for life! You are all learning so much and are going to do great things. Love you Joseph! So proud of the man you are becoming!!! 

xoxo

love you

Mom

I think Joseph would say that we are good parents. Acutally he did say that in a email he sent me on mother's day -

Well mothers day here is on friday, and there it is Sunday, and since we call every week we aren't going to be calling on Sunday.

Soooo I thought I'd wish you happy mother's day today!!

I didn't realize how great of a mom you were until I got out teaching families that live in broken homes. People that, for one reason or another, live in familiy circumstances that are just really hard. We're trying to help them with the Gospel, but it has also made so grateful for the gospel centered home I grew up in. Haha that's kind of weird to say "the home I grew up in" as if I finished growing up because it doesn't feel like I have even though I kind of have. I think if I'm lucky I'll be able to live at the house for a few months until school states at the Y before I'll be completely on my own. Or I'll be on my own the same day I get home. We'll see what happens I guess. But I really do appreciate all you guys have done to bring us up in a home where you and dad taught us what we should and shouldn't do and helped us learn so that we can choose for ourselves. Being a parent, I am starting to darme cuenta, is probably a lot harder than I used to think it was. And the fact that you do it with so many kids! As Iveth said in her whatsapp message you are incredible mom. People don't believe me that I have 11 siblings until I show them the photo. Then they count, ask if daniel and owen are twins, and ask where the 12th one is and I explain that he was just barely born so I haven't even met him yet. They are really super amazed and I am also super amazed. I don't know how you do it but you do. Kind of like the printing of the Book of Mormon.

So keep teaching the rest of the kids and using come follow me and helping them develop Christlike attributes and read the Book of Mormon every day and they'll all turn out great!

Thanks for all you've done and continue to do for me!! Remember that your number one fan in preaching the Gospel in the Promised Land!

LOVE YOU MOM!!

________________

So I hope and do believe that all of our kids will eventually remember us that way. But we've found a new youtube channel that I think accurately shows our relationship with most of our children right now, which is we are the bad guys that are too strict, too mean, and too demanding. The channel is called Odd1sOut or Odd 1s Out, (I'm not sure if it has spaces in it or not). So I first came across these last Thursday (8/8/19) when Corey sent me video titled "My Mom's Cruel and Unusual Punishments". Corey and I have a lot in common with this video. One reason being that Corey spent much time as a child on the inside of circular clothing racks. Another way we relate is cause of how we also sometimes use the strategy of taking bites of their treats to get them to behave,

So I think this mom is basically me, or atleast how I feel like I want to act "No sugar!"

including her semi-permanent scowl, ha. No time to mess around with so many kids. I feel like I always need to get down to business and be efficient.

I love at 5:24 where his mom kicks the cell phone from his hand. "NO wasting time on youtube!! Go Practice!"

I also liked the humor of parenting in the Clothes video, and part of the Wrong Numbers reminded me what it's like sometime as I try to point out the obvious to my teens. I'm also pretty frugal/cheap and make them pay for most of their "wants" at Walmart or Kid to Kid. I'll buy needs or treat them to shopping at the DI though, aren't I generous!

So those were my favorite parts, try to spot them if you give it a watch.

Some of our other favorites from his channel so far: Ethan, who worked as Subway for 2 days and who also knows the life of a fast food employee, enjoyed the Subway videos - Subway 1, Subway 2, Subway 3. And then today I had a flashback to my own childhood as we watched his commentary on the Dark Crystal, I remember all those freaky puppets!! My children had never heard of the Dark Crystal, and now their interest is piqued!

Oh the 80s and the entertainment we grew up with! I wonder if my mother saw that with us? If she did, what did she think of it? I don't recall having nightmares from the Dark Crystal, but I do remember being terrified of Gremlins. I never saw it, I just saw the commercial for it, and I also remember seeing a book about the movie around my house, that I looked at with curiosity and fear. Ok, so anyway, I think I had great parents. And I think and hope we're doing a good job parenting and preparing our kids for what it out there in the world waiting for them!