Quote Wall 2

We all know that our house is full of cute kids, as demonstrated by this pic below of cute cute Katharine.

We also have very funny children, the little ones and the big ones. I'd say they mostly get it from their father, although I'm kinda witty too sometimes. I always feel very proud of myself if I can surprise Corey with a clever comment and make him laugh. He's always making me laugh. 

On Saturday morning, as we were in St. George packing up to go home, Corey had me laughing as he mulled over in his head some thoughts about bowling. So Ethan's bowling ball is missing and he's made some "Have you seen me" posters with a photo of it that he's thinking of putting up around campus to try and find his ball. I told him not to do it, cause I seriously doubt it will bear any fruit. I don't think any fellow student took his ball. I think he just misplaced it or lost it somewhere. Corey told him not to and then confided "I do feel like a failure of a parent because he likes bowling... at a key moment in his development he needed a sport, a challenge, and we missed it, so that's what's left for him. ...and then he BRAGS about it so unabashedly, he's not even aware of the shame..."

I sent that to Mel in a text, but told her that dad did not want to be quoted on it. And I'm catching up here on the blog (today is actually April 24) so I'm hoping that I can put that here and not be found out. Cause it was a funny quote. Melodie captures funny quotes from the family. I put the first installment of family quotes here on the blog in November. Mel sends out her collection of quotes on Wride Nation every month or so. Here are all the ones I've gotten since November (I think)... 

• Mom to Eth at cabin “how you doing?” Eth as he strikes a superman pose “feeling completely normal and healthy!”
• “In Wesley’s defense, I’m super good.” - Joe, paraphrased by eth (playing foosball)
•  Eth (i think): “As Jim always says, put enough sauce on it and it’ll go in.” Joe: “I’ve never heard him say that.”
• Mom: "I don't think we're going to buy eggs, they're expensive right now." Sophie: "Well we can just get some milk and let it molt"
• Wes: "Abi, have I ever told you that you have an amazing voice?" Abi, flattered: "No!" Wes: "Yeah... So stop singing."
• “Each time he screams his teeth get one shade whiter” - Joseph as Ethan wails because his whitening strips sting
• “Look at all these humans that Mom and Dad made!” - Ethan
• Mel: “tomorrow is Christmas Adam because Adam came before Eve” Ethan: ”If tomorrow is Christmas Adam that means today is Christmas GOD. Does that make the day after Christmas Christmas Cain?”
• Mom: “Everyone say thanks to Mel for making dinner” Everyone: “thanksss mellll” Owen: “thanks for the ONE piece of chicken!” Ethan: “That was the most passive-aggressive comment I’ve ever heard.”
• Mel, trying to encourage Ethan before his date “Don’t stress it, just be yourself!” Ethan: “That’s what I’m afraid of!”
• “This is a priesthood obligation! I need to go on this date so I can find a wife to financially support… And love.” - Ethan
• Mel singing Peter: “that hurts my ears! It’s making me have nightmares.”
• "How was your first day of classes? I can see that you haven't left your bed yet, that's a good sign... Doing homework in your bed? That's the most self-deceptive thing I've ever heard." - Dad
• On a video call with Hyrum "The worst part of these calls is that I have to see my own face." - Dad
• Mels queue: "Would you like to restate that?"
• Our ancestors in heaven: "So what was your great trial in life?" Mom and Dad "Well, we had 13 kids!" Ancestors: "Yeah, everyone did..." Mom and Dad: "Well, we didn't have to wash our clothes by hand, and we had refrigerators... But we did have to make the hard decision of choosing entertainment that wouldn't degrade us."
• At Pie pizza for joes bday Ethan: “Next time we should go to Chuck E. Cheese!!” 

•  Listening to Fiddler on the roof If I were a rich man Ethan: “Tevya thinking about that double chin on his wife like (flutter tongue) rrrrrrr”
• Ethan singing fiddler on the roof: “Do you love me?“ Daniel: “No.”
“It’s a critical defect of the Y chromosome. If there isn’t a battle to be fought, a male becomes dormant.” - Dad
• Mom: “If you’re righteous, you won’t die before you’ve fulfilled your calling.” Dad: Even if you eat eggs and sausage? Mom: Well, we’re all here to change…
“What’s wrong with Youth in Asia?” - Joseph “Everyone’s talking about how Euthanasia is bad, but whats up with them? What about the youth in America? They’re pretty bad too.” Mom: “I had to euthanize a few caterpillars..” *flashback to mom freezing caterpillars and squishing with a rock • “Mom, am I an orphan?” -Natalie
• “I will spank you on the eyeballs until you die.” - Peter

• “I just want someone to be obsessed with me!” - Abi
• Peter, touching his nipples: “Dad, look at these tiny things!”
• “I did not fart! I always own up to it! Wes, don’t let them accuse me” - Ethan
• Joseph and Ethan thinking that the woman with an issue of blood had a cut in her arm
• Dad: “What guy here has ever felt tempted by impure thoughts about women?” *Daniel raises his hand Dad: “If Sophie was with me all the time, I would never make a mistake again. The other day at church after after talking with Sister Eakins, Sophie came up and asked “Who was that woman you were talking to??” 

• “Dad would pay us to keep an eye on Ethan and Ella” Sophie: “I remember that! We would watch you all day.”
• Ethan: “When I was running for SBO in 8th grade, I just finished my presentation and I got up in front of the entire school, and the best thing I could come up with to say was: “I really have to pee right now.” Dad: “You know, the guy you were running against told you yo say that.” Ethan: “He did??” •Mom: “I think it’s a little harsh to say that all men are naturally pigs” Joseph and Ethan and Wes: “I disagree.”
• “Die for your own honor!” - Owne
• Dad: “Who left their food here on the table?” Daniel, with his plate right next to it: “I saw Owen do it…”
• Abi: “Why did we buy so much oatmeal? Mel: “Because we eat oatmeal every day!” Abi: “No, we COOK oatmeal every day.”
• Mel: “Everything is funny at 1am” Ethan “Then 2am hits and everything is super depressing” Joe: “I had a midlife crisis at 3am waiting for Zeb at the airport.”
• Eth: “It was so weird, she held my hand and said ‘we could pretend that we’re dating!’” Mel: “You do that do me all the time” Eth: “Yeah, but we’re related!” Wes: “that doesn’t make it better”