Tonight was Wesley's last hockey game, and I'm kicking myself that I didn't go. I didn't have a car, but I could have figured out a way. I should have had Corey pick me up on his way there. The game was at 9:15. Wes had taken the van around 8 to go, and Corey went to dinner with Ethan in Lehi around 7 and then after he was done, he called to see if I was ok with him going to Wesley's game. I should have told him to come get me. Abi and Lily were home and could have babysat. ANYWAY, no use longing for what I can't change, but it was the last game of the season AND Wesley's last-last game since he is a senior. He's been wanting to score a goal all season and practicing and praying for God's help. Well, tonight was really the final and last chance for him. And miracle of miracles, tonight was the night that he scored! They were down 4-1 near the end of the 2nd period and then Wesley scored a sweet goal - the keeper was down on the ice cause he got down to get the puck, but then it got knocked away and Wes had it and was able to chip it up over the keeper and into the net. Everyone on his team was so excited for him! Wes in the center here (white helmet) right after the goal, yay!
One of his teammates kept setting him up with more pucks after that, and he took several more shots. So it was 2-4 going into the 3rd period, and the momentum totally shifted and they had an awesome 3rd period. They came from behind and tied it up 4-4 by the end of the game, and Wesley almost scored another goal with 5 seconds left but it just barely got nicked out of the way. He was so happy! Right after his goal, his coach asked the ref for the puck and they taped it "First Goal 2/1/23". That will be kept for a memento of a great memory that I'm sure Wes will replay in his mind for many years to come. It was great, and yeah, I wish I had been there!
I was feeling pretty anxious/restless tonight. It had been a full day, and I had carpool and also had to take Katharine and Peter along with me to get an oil change before that, and they were fine while we were there, but I wanted some time alone (I thought) but now I'm looking back with some hindsight and remembering the Laura Dixon coaching call today, she's focusing on anxiety this month, and specifically asked us to think "What is my anxiety trying to teach me?" She said to first be AWARE of our anxiety and name it "I am feeling anxious" and then to NEUTRALIZE it, so that it isn't a bad thing we need to get rid of, just find a way to neutralize it and sit with it, be calm, and lastly to EMBRACE it, listen to it "What is this anxiety trying to teach me?" Cause there is a reason we are feeling it. She gave an example that as a kid, there was one bus driver that whenever she saw him, she just felt anxious. Years later she came to learn that he was a sex offender. So her anxiety was there for a reason and to protect her, warning her to be careful and watchful. So, now looking back, I think my restlessness tonight was trying to let me know there was something important to go to (Wesley's game) but I was thinking I wanted to go to the temple but couldn't cause I didn't have a car, so I was feeling negative (not neutral) and was sad that I couldn't escape the home and kids tonight, but I did just go get out some of my restlessness on the treadmill for 30 minutes, but I think what I should have done, had I EMBRACED my restlessness and sat and thought for a few minutes, maybe done a brain dump, was to go to Wesley's game and walk on the treadmill there. I had become aware of my restlessness/anxiety, but I didn't neutralize it or embrace it. I will do that next time, and I hope that will help me to not miss the fun memory next time.
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