Friday, December 16, 2011

I'm a Fundie!

Who's watching you?

Well ~ news from the land of blogging. Apparently I'm a "fundie" (religious fundamentalist) and am enjoying some nit-picking from some people over at freejinger.org. Go over and read all the exciting chatter here! Go on, I'll wait til you get back.

Ok, now my a-little-bit-more-thought-out response.

First, let me say that in most of my blog posts I am not putting my best foot forward, but talking to my family and sharing with them and also friends far and near what our chaos is like, hoping to make them smile as they know they're not alone - that life with kids is crazy chaos mixed up with hundreds of delightful moments everyday. (Especially when you are a family with kids living abroad out of suitcases for an unexpected extended period of time. Those pictures from our drive to Samara Beach were on a dirt road in the middle of nowhere Costa Rica, not downtown LA. Not to excuse myself... but my husband was gone thousands of miles away in Chile at the time and I was alone in central America just trying to survive. Now that it's all in the past, I must say it was worth it and I'd be open to doing it again. Yes, I am nuts.)

Secondly, anonymous judgmental woman were not my target audience. Today Corey's sarcasm and wit made me laugh... he told me to keep the blog up for our friends in Chile and Costa Rica and wherever else. Corey's had some thoughts that I had posted, but I've edited out just now. He said he was just spouting out some knee-jerk reactions, mostly trying to make me feel better (it worked) - but didn't actually want me to publish them - that he wouldn't have wanted to offend anyone, so sorry. Corey told me that his entire life growing up he's gotten used to people criticizing his lifestyle and its always been a source of curiosity to him. Perhaps their concerns were based upon a true desire for the health and safety of our family. We'll get rid of that T-shield carseat, but the infant carseat is not expired. And I'm not worried about my relationship with my 2 year old, although I'm not opposed to spanking. I'm not going to go through and rebut all of the concerns, don't want to bother with any of this non-drama.

But anyway, I made it private for an hour while I tried to figure out who was stalking us, pretty easy to do with google. So, when I figured that out and after Corey's reassurance (since of course I always defer to him on big decisions!) I decided I'm okay with the criticism for now. But really seems like there's something better they could do with their time ~

17 comments:

  1. Wow. I'm sorry? (Is that the most appropriate response?) What a crazy thing to have happen to you. I'm kind of surprised all of those people kept reading and reading -- usually if I start reading a "personal" blog of someone I don't really know I'm bored right away. Just wanted to tell you we love you and your lovely kids.

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  2. First of all, its FREEjinger.org, not jinger.org. If you are going to have a hissy fit at least get the name of our website correct. Secondly, the majority of us who commented about your blog were legitimately concerned for the safety of your children. You can say whatever you want about the "up to date"ness of your car seats, etc, but MANY of your statements on this blog show a complete and utter lack of concern for your children and their safety. Considering foregoing a cast for a broken bone, allowing children to pile on top of each other in the back of a moving car, taking pictures of a children as you spank her and then posting them on the internet....these are all SERIOUS red flags for many other mothers. If you want to make your blog private, go right ahead, its not going to stop of from pointing out your seriously lapses in judgement with regards to your children.
    Sincerely,
    A member at FREEJINGER.org

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  3. thanks liz with a little "l" - love ya. and thanks Liz with a big L, I corrected the name of the website.

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  4. Hey Tiff. Patrice here. This is in their Freejinger.org rules:

    "You are fully aware that most of us are making fun of the freaks and fruitcakes that drop litters of children. You are here because you're fascinated by the societal currents that give rise to these whackjobs. If you ARE one of these whackjobs, be aware of what you're stepping into and stop crying."

    Take pride Tiff. You are now an official inductee of the FREEJINGER Freak-fruitcake-whackjob hall of fame!! That's my big sister. Now if only all of our uncles/aunts and cousins had blogs.... I think we might overwhelm them with the litters of children being dropped. Or maybe we'd just make them happy knowing they're even more of us Freak-fruitcake-whackjobs out there in crazy Utah (I'm working on the mid-west branch). :)

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  5. It's amazing we survived a childhood with no seatbelts and no carseats... it wasn't required by law back then. How horrible of our government not to force our parents to strap us in like we're going into the atmosphere (click, click, clickedy, click). I have to say Tiff, when I think about how I want to raise my kids, I often think of your family. The kids have amazing imaginations, they play, they work, they've had amazing travels and experiences, and they have faith. I want to be a mom like you.
    Now, that being said. Make your blog private and invite the people you and Corey want to keep up with. People YOU want to see what's going on with the family. :)

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  6. @ Patrice- I Love you!

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  7. A lot of kids didn't survive their childhoods before child safety restraints and seatbelts.

    http://www-nrd.nhtsa.dot.gov/Pubs/811160.pdf

    Since 1978, which was when the first state passed a child restraint law, almost 9000 children have been saved by the use of child seats.

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  8. tif and corey, i think you guys are awesome, have such a cool family, and are model parents. even the very best on this earth have their bitter detractors

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  9. One thing I do know is that it's entirely possible to make it through one's toddler years without a broken bone, especially with safety restraints, helmets, and not allowing trampolines in the yard. Because of things like that, my niece is almost 4 and has never once broken a bone.

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  10. Oh wow! Tiff I am so glad you ignored them! I might shrink and die. I have loved your blog. It is real. The whole spanking post was the best (there is a difference between discipline and child abuse, you know the difference, wish the world did). I was giggling about the pictures all night when I read it. My little girl would have looked exactly the same, more embarrassed than anything, (and I would have been furious with my scriptures ripped), and my girl too is coloring and ripping my whole house apart. Anyone who has met you for half a minute would know what a wonderful mother you are! You are a patient, kind, loving mother. Your viewers are world wide. My favorite posts where when you were in South America. You made me laugh, cry, be homesick and long to live in another country. Keep it going girl!

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  11. Hey, if you want to have a hissy fit (which I think is unfair, you were nice) then have a hissy fit, it's YOUR blog. I dont think they have ever heard the statement "If you can't say anything nice don't say anything at all". Guess something like that would put their website out of commission. Even if someone read every single entry on this blog it would not give them an accurate representation of the caring, loving, sensitive mother my sister is. But if they want to clump you in with Michelle Duggar, that's pretty good company! Love you Tiff!!

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  12. I don't think anyone is against car-seats. We use them every day. Yes, while traveling the slow dirt roads of Costa Rica over a year ago Tiff went without them for a few days. While in Costa Rica, we also picked up hitchhikers sometimes – often women with children on their laps so they wouldn’t have to walk on the edge of the road with no sidewalk. We didn’t usually force their kids to get into our car seats - though I did sometimes. I remember one family got "sea sick" when we took them home - they hadn't even been used to riding in car and the kid threw up. He also got sick riding buses and was much more comfortable on his mother's lap. Its a different world outside the US, and one we wanted our kids to get a taste of that.

    I left for Chile early, took as much luggage as I could with me (including car seats) so my wife wouldn't have to wrestle with them. We had arranged for a driver to pick her up and take everyone to the airport and sent a housekeeper over to help cook, clean, and watch kids as needed. She decided to go out on her own and (without car seats) felt it was crazy enough to blog about it. But its interesting that those who mock large families (and presumably would have preferred our children had never been born) would then feign outrage about an isolated event over a year ago that compromised their safety...the safety of children who should have never been born. The obvious truth is that we mess up every day - we make mistakes, overreact, forget things, and fall short of our own standards. It’s nice to have a place to share the ups, downs, and misses with family and friends, even if that means random strangers may take strange pleasure lurking around our family history pointing out where we fall short.

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  13. I don't think you need to defend yourself. You know your family and the circumstances of things. People want to nit-pick on everything- you're damned if you do damned if you don't. I still think you're great and doing a fabulous job as a mom (of course from everything I read) But I'm with Becka, make your blog private, you don't need the negative readers.

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  14. I thing that is too bad that there are entire groups of people that are so insecure that they gather together to mock and look down on people. Sardonic insecurity on parade. I love the blog. I hope you will take whatever you can genuinely learn from this, ignore the rest and move on. :-}

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  16. Also, to Liz with the capital "L":

    I call absolute BS that you were concerned about the safety of the children. If that had been the case, you would have contacted Tiffanie directly in a way designed to improve the safety. Instead, you basically trolled on a site set up for people who don't have the courage to troll directly, and then came here using a one-off login to whine about getting your site's name wrong. What concern for the poor children!

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  17. DAVE! You are too funny, you make me laugh. Thanks for the info - I hadn't googled it and didn't know it was about Jinger Duggar. And you do got snark - they wouldn't stand a chance against you. :) I printed up your "Foos Fools" from the TenFold days, was reading that to my kids this past week, you are too funny!

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